dan asked me what i would do when hockey season ended
Play video games, probably.

The Eastern Conference seedings are set in stone now no matter what happens in todays games. There is one game that could effect the Western Conference, but it's for a team I don't care about. :P The games today are Chicago-Detroit, St. Louis-Colorado, Boston-NYI, and Philly-NYR. Actually a Chicago win could move them up one, because they would be tied with Vancouver at 102 points, but it would give them 46 wins to Vancouver's 45. And over halfway through the second period it looks like that might happen. Which would be nice, the Blackhawks are my second favourite team in the West (after the Sharks). They've got adorable Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews, and some of their team videos are absolutely hysterical.

Eastern Conference!
Boston Bruins (1) vs. Montreal Canadiens (8): This is going to be a sweet fucking series. The Bruins and the Habs are both Original 6 and have one of the oldest feuds in hockey. Their games are physical and violent and massively entertaining. I believe the most recent game they played had basically a whole team battle, with a standing-room-only penalty box. Heehee, actual quote from the write-up of that game: "But the second period – oh, the second period. There are crazy, penalty-marred games, and then there’s the WWE Smackdown on Ice that occurred last night." 54 penalty minutes handed out in the second period! Man, I really wish I'd seen it now. Anyway, it's shameful to admit to liking Boston teams, but I really do like the Bruins and this will be fucking fantastic.

Plus their website displayed massive pictures of their cutest players with the tagline "We want it as bad as you do." Really guys? Because I want it pretty badly... ;)

Washington Capitals (2) vs. New York Rangers (7): These are my boys, and I love them to death. We are Southeast Division Champions again (the GovSqApt has the 07-08 banner hanging over the Couch Fantastic) and have been putting forth some pretty solid hockey (and it don't get no better than solid). All I really know about the Rangers is they have Sean Avery, and I'm kind of hoping he gets bitchy, because our team does not seem to enjoy dropping the mittens and I would really love to see some of that. But this reluctance might also have something to do with the fact that our enforcer Donald Brashear has been out for a while with a sprained knee. Not that some of our other dudes can't fight (some of them shouldn't, but that... marks the fourth time I've linked to that video, and it's relevant because it's against the Rangers!) but our big-name players aren't known for being scrappers. NYR also has one of the four Staal brothers currently playing professional hockey: Marc. We did pretty well against the Rangers in the regular season, and even though we've been sucking dick lately, I think that's because we clinched reasonably early and said fuck this, I don't want to play hockey. D: An energized enthusiastic Caps team should be beautiful to watch, and I'm not just talking about Nick Backstrom, David Steckel, Jose Theodore, and Sasha Semin.

New Jersey Devils (3) vs. Carolina Hurricanes (6): Yeah, I don't know much about the Devils except they've got Marty Brodeur in net, who like broke some records or something.* Because the Canes are in our division I know slightly more about them, not that it's useful because they are wildly inconsistent. They've got one of the four Staal brothers currently playing professional hockey: Eric. Oh, haha, they played yesterday and Devils won 3-2. Anyway these games I don't plan on watching unless my alternative is baseball.

*He's one of the best goalies of all time.

Philadelphia Flyers (4) vs. Pittsburgh Penguins (5): On the other hand I am watching the FUCK out of this game. I know a bunch of players on both teams but have no loyalty to either of them, meaning every goal will get a cheer and I will be rooting not for one particular player to win a fight but for two guys to get the shit beat outta them. The Pens have got two of the most talented players in the NHL and much as I love/hate Crosby and Malkin I fall firmly on the side of love watching them, at least. They've also got one of the four Staal brothers currently playing professional hockey: Jordan.

Western Conference!
San Jose Sharks (1) vs. either St. Louis Blues or Anaheim Ducks (8): Man, I know nothing about the Blues or the Ducks, except Disney made some movies about the latter (they were originally called the Mighty Ducks of Anaheim which is one of the most amusing pro sports names ever) but I do heart the Sharks. They've got Jumbo Joe Thornton and Evgeni Nabokov, both of whom I like a lot. I personally think Joe Thornton is handsome and Nabby is cute, albeit in a dweeby way. (I couldn't find a good picture of him not in goalie equipment, so I thought I'd just show you why I think goalies in general are hot: look at how fucking flexible they are. Check out Dominik Hasek.) So, uh, go Sharks!

Detroit Red Wings (2) vs. either Blues or Ducks (7): I know I'm committing some huge hockey fan foul by not knowing anything about the Red Wings or even caring, but... I don't know or care. They're super and awesome and have more Stanley Cups than anyone else so yay.

Vancouver Canucks (3) vs. Columbus Blue Jackets (6): Boy, I can't name a single player on either team. I wikipedia'd both and now I've got a few from each but hey, if I don't care, you care even less.

Chicago Blackhawks (4) vs. Calgary Flames (5): I like the Blackhawks. They've got adorable Patrick Kane who wears my old favourite number (88) and their captain Jonathan Toews who wears the same number as two of my other favourite players in the NHL (19), and neither of them are old enough to drink. They've also got Burish and Sharp, whom I know nothing about on the ice, but they are adorable pranksters. I know nothing specifically about the Flames either, except they were Bret Hart's hockey team, and their AHL farm team was called the Calgary Hitmen after him, and their colours were black and pink for awhile. How cute.

Haha, the Hawks just won so it looks like it will actually be Vancouver vs Calgary and Chicago vs Columbus. Anyway, I have laundry to put away, so I'll leave you with Sporcle. I'm proud to say I can not only fill this entire one in and in under a minute, but I can do it by division. No more forgetting the Predators, Senators, or Kings! (Warning: That website will magically suck away all your time.)

Oh yeah, and happy Easter. I was confused as to why there was a bunch of cupcakes with jelly beans on them at the caf, but I figured it out in the end.